There was a time telling a chic that you live in Muyenga would get you laid because everybody associated the area with the paid so, many chics got played. Y’all remember the 2005 hit song “Ani akumanyi” by Gatimo and Grace Nakimera? The guy was throwing vibes with lines like, “I live in Muyenga” to a chic playing hard to get. Back in the day, that line was sufficient to get the dark clouds loose and the gardens wet and messy. Any farmer would dig, weed, and harvest the fruits of his labour till the hoes literally broke his back.
Apparently that line was crafted by residents of Namuwongo. Beneath the feet of the sprawling high rise buildings of the quiet and quaint Muyenga lies Namuwongo a noisy ghetto with more hungry dogs than cars.
It is a ghetto. It is split into two parts by the railway line with the other half bordering the industrial area. Both Muyenga hill and the industrial area, Namuwongo seem to deny this area as no man’s land. The mention of “no-man’s land” in this city may spur a land grabber into action but hey, here are 10 things that only happen in “that part of Namuwongo”.
- That is the only place in this country where primary school kids are more conversant with the lyrics of Gravity Omutujju songs than the national anthem. May God uphold thee!
- Namuwongo is the only place in Uganda where somebody will tell you he is a killer by occupation. “Me, I am a killer. I kill every day. I spray and kill cockroaches, bedbugs and fleas. I fumigation”.
- Namuwongo is the only place in Kampala where Victor Kamenyo or Gravity Omutujju would beat Lord Mayor Erias Lukwago in a ballot. These two rappers are so popular in the area because they “understanding them very good”.
- Namuwungo is the only place that has more hungry dogs than satisfied people.
- Namuwongo is the only place in Kampala where casual labourers in the industrial area are the corporate class.
- Namuwongo is the only place where a person will threaten that he knows some big shots in Muyenga to get away with crime.
- Namuwongo is the only place where people call for shots of waragi.
- Namuwongo residents usually confuse people that they live in Muyenga hill.
- 99% of children in Namuwongo want to be rappers like Gravity.
- Namuwongo residents would rather pay for malwa than pay electricity bills or buy food.