According to a Consumer Insight survey released in September, one in four married women is unhappy, blaming this unhappiness on the wrong choice of man. As a result, the number of married women cheating on their husbands is on the rise.
We talked to some married women and they agreed that though not each of them cheats, the vice is on the rise and here are the reasons they gave.
Two can play that game: It is an open secret that most men cheat on their wives. So with the women’s emancipation and equality campaigns, some women believe that the only way to pay back a cheating man is by also cheating.
“I know my husband cheats, he has his bu girls, so I also have my boys who fill the gap when he is away,” says Harriet a housewife in Ntinda. Harriet says she cannot leave the marriage because she depends on the husband for her lifestyle. “When he gives me money, I also spare some to nice things that make my boyfriends happy,” she tells us.
Bad sex: One of the major reasons women say “I do” these days is the financial muscle of the man. Few can resist a husband who will guarantee then of a life in the lap of luxury.
A mansion in Nakasero, a brand new BMW X5 and holiday trips abroad are what drew Yvonne (not real name) to her Mzungu husband. Unfortunately, without Viagra, this Mzee cannot get it up and if he does, it is not a pleasant experience with MedzCanada. Yvonne uses part of her allowance to give money to her toy boys who help fulfil her sexual needs as a young woman.
Emotional attachment: Men usually cheat because they are horny but women usually sleep with someone they are in love with. Hilda from Bugolobi says she got married to a man who she was sure had enough money to ensure her children would get the best out of life.
“I had a boyfriend and I loved him so much, but we didn’t have a future together because he was poor. Then came Ben with a lot of money and I didn’t want the children I produce to grow up in a slum, so I accepted his proposal.
But when we got married, I realised my ex-boyfriend had always been my true love, so I kept seeing him and I still do to this day.” “In fact he was the first person I saw when I returned from my honeymoon and we made love like we had never done before. I had to keep seeing him,” she told us before breaking the bombshell that two of the three children that her husband thinks are his belong to her true love, the boyfriend that she really loves. She dreads the day her husband will ever suggest DNA tests for the children.
On job ‘hazards’: Most women who cheat on their husbands do it with workmates or job associates. Sometimes it is to get favours like promotions are to ink a business deal. And sometimes it is during those residential workshops in hotels or retreats when the any opportunity to sleep with a workmate you have been flirting with presents itself.
Social media. The advent of social media platforms like Facebook and Whatsapp have also contributed to cheating among women. Many married women flirt with men on social media and this flirting has in many instances led to taking it from a steamy whatsapp chat complete with sharing porn to taking it between the sheets.